RoboSpanker: The Life Of A Party!

Remember not to wake the neighbors!

Close your eyes. Yes, you. Close your eyes & have someone read this to you.

Scenario A: Imagine yourself at a regular party. Your friends are drinking, eating, smoking & just screwing around in general. People get drunk, a few even manage to pass-out and then soon the party fizzles out and everyone leaves. There's literally no climax. People just leave after a few laughs and drinks. The End.

Scenario B: Imagine yourself at a party. Your friends are drinking, eating, & hittin' the billy-billy-bing-bong. Similar to Scenario A, some people get drunk & even more get tipsy, but no one has time to pass-out only because out of the blue, a friend rolls out a huge black apparatus that ultimately takes the shape of a mechanical spanking machine---The RoboSpanker! I am a big fan of the world famous mechanical bull, mind you, but the RoboSpanker is tip-top! At first everyone remains confused, shy and even disgusted, but luckily you invited 'that' crazy girl who you knew would be down to be Spank Victim Numero Uno & help to open the flood gates for future participants. Now, I know all you girls just got crazy chills and goose bumps all over your bodies, but don't be too appalled. Those symptoms are perfectly natural and are signs of your subconscious desires to be RoboSpanked! (Maybe one or two light spanks?)

The point I'm trying to make above is that if you're in college or merely a bachelor who throws crazy parties with any type of clientele (rich, beautiful, ugly, young, old, whatever), you must order in a RoboSpanker and spice up the life of your party. It's one of those long-term investments that will pay itself off in endless nights of crazy-western-sex with women of your choice. Ok---ok, maybe I took it a bit too far, but if not sex, I'm sure you'll get to see plenty of booty! [Remember, 'booty quality' is entirely contingent upon who you invite, so keep that mind if you want to break out the RoboSpanker. You don’t want a 500-lb Monica Lewinsky jumping on and scaring away everyone even before the RoboSpanker has a chance to warm up.]

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