Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes "Dating" In Italy
Sunday, May 1st, 2005 around evening with martini & women in hand by Moe
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Last Friday we laid down the facts of the bullshit, superficial, & financially motivated relationship between Ms. Virgin Mary (a.k.a. Katie Holmes) & Mr. Gay Sciencetologist* (a.k.a. Tom Cruise). CelebNewsWire has solved this scandalous puzzle.
1. Katie's reportedly an unsullied maiden, telling friends that she is saving herself for marriage.
2. Not being a sexually savvy woman, Ms. Holmes most likely does not have a finely-tuned gaydar.
3. Katie takes up with Chris Klein, a man of questionable sexuality, and they are engaged for three years.
4. Never having had sexual intercourse, Katie doesn't suspect a thing.
5. Katie and Chris split up for unknown reasons.
6. In an interview, Katie states that her dream date is "Oooh, Tom Cruise in Risky Business."
7. Tom, long rumored to be a good Friend of Dorothy, gets wind of the fact that there is a new, willing, clueless cutie available for beard duty dates.
8. Tom has a new movie about to come out. Katie has a new movie about to come out.
9. Their publicists make a few calls, and
10. A "romance" is birthed!
[CelebNewsWire]
If that's not enough, read what was overheard between these two sexy bitches while they were in attendance @ the David Di Donatello Awards show last week in Italy.
*Sciencetologist are apparently anti-homosexual, so that brings into question why Tom Cruise was ever allowed in as a member.
Read more in Katie Holmes, Scandalicious, Sex & Celebrities, Temporarily In Love
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She doesn't need any boob job man. Just watch The Gift and you'll understand why. God awful terrible movie, but we get to see some Joey Potter boobs!
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damn you people with high standards.
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Katie has some gorgeous boobs, no implant needed. If you don't believe me check her out in "The Gift" she flashes for a little while. They are one of the best set of boobies I've seen, she's up there with Angie Jolie.
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Agreed. She's gorgeous as is. However, just cuz she is like three feet taller that whistlebritches there doesn't mean she has to start slouching. Stand up straight girl.
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shit! Thanks, kit :-)
I think I need to stick to shorter sentences.
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After seeing a few Batman screen caps, I take the boob comment back. Dear lord!
I have to do an apology post now. Damn it.
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how old is tom cruise now?
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42 & 26.
NOt as hot as Michael Dougie: 61 & 36! ~25 yrs, man!!
good for the old guys!
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Wow, kit shut the fuck up? thx hun. anyways, i agree she has nice breasts, and "The Gift" is so scary! i loved it. And a little sidenote on tom cruise, ever since i heard his retarded scientologist statement on Oprah (or whatever talk show host it was) that people with clinical depression dont need meds IVE HATED HIM. I take like 50 thousand anti depressants and without them i would be more fucked up than i already am (semi-recovered anoretic/bulimic of 9 years). Zoloft, Welbutrin, Celexa and Remeron to name a few. Scientology is the most cultish FUCKED up "religion" ever. I dont like Tom Cruise anymore... I hope poor Katie doesnt get sucked up into that simple minded BULL shit.
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How long do you think the charade of Tom Cruise will be able to go on, regarding his well known homosexuality?
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I heard on the news that both of his other marriages ended just before the 10 year point as the divorce settlement for a women is much greater if your married for 10 years or longer. I can't remember how much greater but it is obviousely it's enough that he doesn't want to take that chance.
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betting-line
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She got a staring role.. it pays well.. I give up on trying to hope for and defending her. She is neither ignorant or unaware of what she is doing.. Her parents, relatives, friends, the whole world has spoken on how wrong it is.. Poor child she is giving Tom must gravely suffer and her loved ones, any concern watch and dread.. All this publicity will follow and haunt him all his days.. In my book that makes her abusive and as Manipulative as Tom Cruise. This child will be born into aggressive unloving cult brainwashing, cult mind control, thought reform, coercive persuasion, influence, manipulation, cult formation to bring in others and intimidate them as well.. Shame shame shame.
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okay this is my first time ever seeing this site but I read these posts and I have to say I think Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are good for each other...oh so what bout their age my parents are 22 years apart and they have been together for 15 years...age shouldnt matter if you love some one...and that should count for Katie and Tom to!
signed
**Someone**
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[...] You heard it here first. Naturally, he'll never admit it, but he is. And it's oh-so-obvious now that he's with that little chickibum Katie Holmes, who is MY AGE! Pederass. Man, what I would have DONE to be in the room with Nicole Kidman when the news was broke. I can picture it now: Nicole, sitting in her doctor's chair, five needles stuck in her face, pumping her wrinkly skin full of fresh Botox, screaming and cursing Katie Holmes out for being the third bitch to ride the Cruise mobile after he dumped her Aussie ass. [...]
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134 yrs old.
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Seconded.
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I think a verb is missing in the last sentence of the second picture... "Let's let the photographers in the back this one too". There should be a verb in between back and this, like get or photograph.
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Agree, it's just the nature of the dress. She's fine.
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