Needs to do Playboy: Jessica Alba
Wednesday, August 23rd, 2006 while thinking about eating a Bastardly Mercado Certified lunch by Moe
First, an introduction: "Needs to do Playboy" is a new category in which we will feature chicks who---get this---need to do Playboy.
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On that note, if our content ever requires more than 2-3 brain cells to process, please do accept our apologies. Every once in a while we drink a little too much coffee in the morning & feel we can conquer the world w/ celebrity gossip! Roar.
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Now, let's admire a few candid snaps of J. Alba. Even though, as of late, this woman has become a conceited whore who thinks she too good for anything & everything, I'm pretty sure 99.8% (0.1% = VITO; 0.1% = VITO'S DEEP HATRED FOR J.ALBA) of the Horndogg Community wants to see her naked body.
She's lost A LOT of her "sexy." Da fuck is wrong with females and this skinny ass trend???..Alba....what happened to ya curves from dem Dark Angel dayz?
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ok why was she together with that stupid mexican....again. gosh she looked so mexican next to him. nevertheless it's j.alba and she always looks hot. yea do playboy but just like show butt and/or bust only.
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I was flipping between the Jessica Biel and Alba photo sets thinking the same thing as dat_doOd when I started wondering, would anyone here NOT bash Alba with a baseball bat if she was standing between you and a horny Jessica Biel?
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===
====== Fiend club. Wilmer is not Mexican. Jessica is Mexican. Do your research.
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======
====== I don't know why she is concieted. On a video clip that TMZ has, it shows her as she breezes right by some fans that ask for her autograph. Doesn't even look at them. =======
========= She can't act, and she's a big time tease.
It's Jessica Biel for me.
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I am also going to go with the moer robust of the two. Beil it is!
By the way for the imbecile asking what is causing all the skinny bitches in hollywoood, its called crack.
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i read that she's rude and difficult to work with on set.
And anyone who made disparaging remarks about how fat her family is and howshe never wanted to look like them is a major bitch. how crass is that...I fucken hate rude people. Girl doesn't realize that a nice pair of tits and ass are a dime a dozen in Hollywood...
telenovelas will be calling soon..or maybe not, she doesn't speak spanish and refuse to associate with her spanish/latina roots
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I like her alot and am a fan, but guess what?I do not know her and do not know if she is or is not a bitch. I think she is gorgeous, but a little more weight could not hurt.
Have any of you met her??? NO, then how do you know she is a conceited bitch? Oh, you don't first hand, then STFU! After you have met her and she disses you, then ok go off on her.But to take second and third hand info and base a conclusion on that is just retarded. I was not aware that the definition of a conceited bitch is someone who will not get naked for you...well Boo *ucking HOO! That would make alot of starlets conceited bitches by that definition.
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friggen sexy
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After reading these comments, I'm thinking, "I'm closer to getting Jessica Alba than ever before! All these haters will be after Jessica Biel! SWEEEEEETTTT!!!!"
Jessica Alba, skinny or not, is feerickkkinnn' HOT!
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I was shocked when I went to TMZ.COM there were more negative posts about her than positive and this is from men and women. I always thought the bastardly was the cruelest website but it looks like they got whooped by TMZ.
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Not only that but I was just over at Perez Hilton. And they bashed her over there real good saying what a damn bitch she is in real life. That blog was filled with scathing comments and after being there you will never make me feel jealous or ashamed to say the truth about this ugly, baboon looking bitch I found out all sorts of things about her. Bastardly is just filled will horny masturbating men. Your comments are retarded compared to what they say at the other website. JESSICA ALBA YOU ARE AN UGLY WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT BITCH AND NOBODY IS JEALOUS OF YOU. SORRY!
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sheena & truth (the same person), fuck you too.
go and wack off on the other sites.
MoeReply to this Comment
Too skinny. Too full of herself.
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Fake ass Latina...all she dates are ugly wiggers...we in the Latin Community will never accept you. Fake ass trick. Why is so hard to stick to your own race?
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Bah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah , just the reaction I wanted.
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"I was flipping between the Jessica Biel and Alba photo sets thinking the same thing as dat_doOd when I started wondering, would anyone here NOT bash Alba with a baseball bat if she was standing between you and a horny Jessica Biel?"
I wouldn't; I don't like Biel that much. But I wouldn't bash either of them with a baseball bat - I'd much rather go after several of the people on this thread. (And since when does not wanting to do nudity constitute being a conceited whore?)
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The comment about her going back to her curves she haboured when she was in Dark Angel was stupid since she was bulimic when she was filming the series.
Hollywood may think shes hot shit even though she cant act but i've seen hispanic chicks in walmart that are just as hot as her and more down to earth and intelligent. She aint got NO fucking selfrespect and she cant act her way outta a paper bag, she should be grateful for her hispanic heritage. If it wasnt for that she'd b an average white chick who cant fucking act. She a fucking sell out.Regarding the fat/skinny chick debate. Fuck it man, females come in all shapes and sizes, and a lot of girls are actually naturally thin due to fast metabolism.as long as you gotta pretty face and an a big personality its all good. Evry chicks ass look good when she getting fucked Doggy.
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All those who think they have something to say about Jessica first go and have a look at yourself. How can you say anything about someone so beautiful when most people cant even be compared to her? All of you who think shes a whore or bitch can just get *ucked you stupid cun*s. And just in case Vito comes onthis site...
Vito you lonely pice of shit. Go get fucked and get a life before you say that someone like jessica is fat. If you say anything else you will be destroyed.
p.s. you are a fat son of a bitch
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dude, the reason people say shit about jessica is because everyone is intitled to their own opinion & who knows who can and cant be compared to her. if people can make fun of someone like sarah jessica parker for beign ugly then they can make fun of j. alba cuz they are both celebs who put themselves in the public eye and are therfore are up for critcism. and maybe if alba wasnt such an openly stuck up snob ppl wouldnt hate her so much. and IMO she looks like shit in these photos, a fugly mexican with a fugly flat ass and a fugly mexican weave.
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Yeah 101 your a lame worthless ass kisser kissing up to that ugly actress. Brainiac was right were smart for not wanting to go by your opinion if we want to think she's ugly we can because she is. And she's a has been anyways
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uhhh Jessica alba is prettyy
and im not a lezbian
so i dont give a fuck about how she looks!
SHEZ FULLOF HERSELF!
and SHEZ NUN without makeup!
Honestly there are alot of girls out there
that dont need makeup to look good!
and the whole
"SEXY BODY"
ummmmmmmm:P
that aint truee
for into the blue poster and pics
her pictures were all fake!
EDITED
so as my friend said "EDITED BITCH"
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So you find "Take a look at that b..." as critic? it only stupid message with no sense, and Honey go and dump your head in a toilet, you dont desserve better you fag.
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i still think shes gorgeous... but the weight thing is true
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