Asslee's SNL Redemption Song
Monday, October 10th, 2005 in the weewizzle hours by Moe
It was one of those heart felt moments in which many-a-tears were shed. Ass came on, the CD went in & she played her music with well-disguised lip syncing. In her new song, which is especially dedicated to her last appearance on SNL, she asked many pointed questions.
Who will be the one to save me from myself? Who's going to catch me when I fall? [Lyrics From Ass' song, Catch My Fall]
Ass, I will attempt to answer your questions with a question of my own: When a whore is servicing one of her clients & her client beats the shit out of her because he just lost his job & his wife left him (took the kids, too), who comes to this battered whore's rescue? The answer? Her pimp, of course.
Ok, ok, I think I'm being a little too harsh. In an attempt to cheer up all Ass fans, take a look at a few snaps from the lamest photo shoot. Ever.
These idiotic photos seem to have rendered this post speechless...Even with her extreme wealth, Ass is unable to save her reputation? I suppose the photographer chose a lame concept so he could watch the world laugh at her...
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WTF?!? Ok people, we REALLY need to up our standards. Take a look at all of the 'singers' and 'actors' out there and tell me how many of them actually have any discernible talent. (this ho certainly doesn't!) There used to be a time when people actually had to be able to do something with some degree of skill to be considered a celebrity. Now, you can just be an ugly ho with a pimpy daddy and you're there!
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omg she looks totally cute with her little barbie toy car. shes just appealing to
her fans age groups, that of 6 yr girls
ASHLEE SUCKS & SO DOES SNL(i grew up during the farley,hartman, spade, sandler
yrs & stopped watching it when will ferrell left)- THEY SUCK!!!!!
i disliked ashlee BEFORE her embarrasment on her 1st app on snl, her "music" is
so bland, so toneless, the bitch is tone deaf, the ONLY reason she is famous is
because of her MORE "TALENTED", more beatiuful, her parents favorite daughter
jessica (jessicajessicajessica)
I HATE "POP CULTURE"-IT IS FULL OF STUPID, SHALLOW,WORTHLESS, NO TALENTED,
UGLY HACKS- paris hilton, nicole richie, anna nicole smith, ASHLEE SIMPSON, that
little poser from up north avril l-whogivesaf-, tara reid
its like being a slutly drunken whore is now some to aspire to. it sickens me to think
that there are women & young girls who look up to these tramps
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She looks sooo stupid. SOSOSOSOS stupid. I want to rip her ugly face off and stomp on it and rip our her black hair extentions and just do something with that potato of a nose.
...rip out her vocal chords...
This is the girl whos 'deep, meaningfull lyrics' have previously contained the words LALA.
Someone kill her.
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That bitch stole my daughter jeep. I should press charges! Cunt!
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Hey Tammy, while pressing charges, see if you can add on some charges for being an ugly ass no-talent ho!
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I'm already on it. I think we can possibly get a charge of "Impersonating Someone Important" which is a felony here in Nebraska. She can get 40 years max.
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She will probably have to be put in solitary confinement for her own protection as she will probably get her ass kicked if she's in general population. I don't think anyone there will want to listen to her wails either.
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When I get my daughters Barbie Jeep back I will have to have it fumigated. My daughter is gonna freak!
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when will people start boycotting this shit?? untalented, useless celebrities making ridiculous money & being famous for nothing!
i wish people would not buy into this crap & refuse to see their movies & buy their music. that's the only legal way we can stop them.
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I actually have 2 of these cruisen toons jeeps. One for Reese (7) and one for Regan (6). They look so cute driving around the block together. If you like you could drive the other and we'll double team her. They do have reverse so we can just back up and do it over and over again. I will start charging the batteries right now!
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She looks EXACTLY like her sister in the first pic.The way she's looking at the camera and doing those little poses...she's going to turn into Paris Hilton within 3 months...
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Nancy, Ass does look just like Jessica in the first pic. So would Kelly Osborne, if the picture is taken FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FUCKING COUNTY.
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ahh the worthless talentless whore that is asslee simpson. she's riding off her sister's fame and even her sister has no talent and is ugly as hell. all she has going for her is her fake rack.
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you should get some spinners on your jeeps.
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I was thinking about getting some dubs on them with a modest sound system. Of course I will have to add alarm system too. I was gonna see if maybe they could be featured on Pimp My Ride. What do you think? My 6 and 7 year old will be bad ass!
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Joe whacking off behind the trees! hahahaha! Can ya believe that freak used to be a Baptist Minister?!? haha! Next, I will find out that Tom Cruise really isn't nuts!
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I am so happy that finally someone realized that she (yet again) just mouthed her words to a cd on SNL. Looks, like little ass practiced a lot this past year with her hair brush in front of a mirror. All the other blogs are falling for that crap...sad
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she is so beautiful and sooo cute. such adorable girl!, I think america is really proud of her
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i think these are the best pictures of ash yet
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^ LOL!
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i went to that link, she looks like heidi on acid
i didnt watch snl, but the bottom left hand picture, why is her MOUTH ON the mic,
shes still lip syncing- she sucks
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. . .
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The one where she's taking Polaroids of herself is by far the worst.... that's like a Mary-Kate Olsen kind of smile (if you want to call it a smile).
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GREAT! That possibly means 40 years without listening to her wailing, or howling, or whatever it is that she attempts to do.
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The TOY? The HOOKER SHOES? The PROVOCATIVE POSES? I smell JOE all over this shit. What disturbs me most about this shoot, is not so much the bizarre combination of little girl/prostitute pictures ~ but that WE KNOW that her FATHER is right there giving the photographer kudos and offering all kinds of sick and probably illegal suggestions. Ultimately JOE gave the approval for this unsettling group of pictures of his OWN DAUGHTER. Also, that's not the most impressive looking toy Jeep available. I'll bet JOE brought Ashlee's ACTUAL childhood toy to the shoot and presented his 'artistic' ideas to the photographer. This shoot is so incredibly lame, I don't believe it's the work of a professional. BTW, If you look closely at the trees in the backround, you will see Joe behind a tree wacking off.
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EXACTLY! None of these disgusting 'celebrity' skanks EVER get any of MY money! It just kills me that these no talent fools get as far as they get. People are stupid. Just go along with whatever the media hands us, like a bunch of sheep......
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OMG she is soooo gorgeous! her face is flawlessly beautiful, I agree america must be very proud of her
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I think you need to go to the eye doctor and get your eyes checked, immediately!!!
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P.S. I found a link so all of you people that think she has talent (and looks, heh) can see what a loser she is~ http://www.hollywoodtuna.com/?p=335
and you two girls that said america is/should be "proud" of this girl, or the family for that matter are certifiably insane. This family is everything wrong with pop culture.
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What I dont get is why she keeps showing uss her butt.
Pinstripes STREACHED over her short legs...ummmmmm seXY! not.
She looks about 12...and i agree she has Monkey Olsen's smile. If i was a guy I wouldnt touch her with a barge pole...if i was a lesbian i wouldnt touch her with a barge pole....if i had to shake her hand.....omg! BLAGHH!
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Tammy, just run this bitch over with the JEEP! hehe!
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are you guys stoned?
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Lately, I think EVERYTHING is wrong with pop culture! Look at the despicable, talentless, crappy people we have for pop culture and tell me any of them are worth anything at all? Like this dumb bitch. For some reason, I just can't stand looking at her! YUK!!
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She is really ugly. That nose, That "butt" chin. She is HOMELY!
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